Saturday, March 6, 2010

I wish I had more hands...to give reality shows four thumbs DOWN!!Ahh ahh ahh!

(Mike B as he sips on some koolaid) Terry Crews? da guy from White Chicks and Everybody Loves Chris? Now he has a reality show now? RIP reality....RIP.


(Mike B as he drinks on some more koolaid) And also expanding on this excellent post "What did the five fingers say to the face" I absolutely hate it when people try to use someone else to get their 15 minutes of fame. And then to top it off....have the nerve to send in their "Eharmony" pictures to the news stations. It still doesnt change the fact that you were all jumpoffs! I guess those women all agree that its better to be a famous jumpoff than a local one huh? Then what gets me is that they try to act like they didnt know he was married.......REEEALYY?



(damn this is some good koolaid!!) I cant wait to see Monique win the Oscar this year for best supporting actress in Precious......please tell me you saw it. You didnt huh. So you are like 40% of the public that agrees that she should get it based off of word of mouth and what you have seen on the trailer....

(????) Hey for all of you people who were on that Cleveland Cavalier Bandwagon ( that's right...Capital B on that bandwagon word....that capital B stands for mailto:B#@$%25#) last year dont stress, cuz this year is not your year and if you dont win the NBA championship this year, you can officially drive that nice red and gold Bandwagon bus off of a bridge!

(Mike B) But I really do hate reality television shows....

(Mike B) You know which ones too....like that one with dude that supposedly lives with his parents yet he is trying to find love....even though he needs to find a job and an apartment....Or any Real Housewives of Anything except Atlanta ( cant lie....that was interesting)......Bully Beatdown......the TO show...(T.O. stands for Terribly ON television).....I can go on and on about it but I know you dont wont to read that....oh you do want to read that? Well too bad cuz I aint typing bout it anymore!



Friday, March 5, 2010

What did the five fingers say to the face...Slap!

RickJamesSlap.gif


When I first heard Ludacris song Slap, I truly felt like Ludacris was speaking to my soul. No matter how hard you try to stay positive and do your part in making a impact in society, there is always someone doing their part in moving society back a couple of notches. How do we handle these people? Being the mature, responsible adults that we are, we try communication and if that does not work, then we flat out ignore them. However, has there ever been a moment when you wanted to revert back to your immature ways and just plain ole’ slap them? I mean one good cock back twice and swing slap. A slap that would be made on behalf of everyone that had to put up with such foolishness. Whether it is actually written down or thought about, I think everyone has a slappy list. With that being said here is my Slappy List (well at least the short version).

All of Tiger Woods mistresses, except for Rachel Uchitel

It is because of you my television, for the past two months, has been saturated with information about Tiger Woods and his love life. Filled with information that I truly do not care about and all because you want your fifteen minutes of fame. Now you have the audacity to ask for sympathy because a company decided to place your face on the side of some golf balls. Are you serious?! Did you have sympathy for Elin Woods and their children? No, so excuse me if 99.9% of the general public decides not to feel sympathy for your trifling… If you would have either A) left him alone or B) closed your mouth, then you would not be in this situation. #imjustsayin

The believers of Jay-Z’s involvement with the occult, Mason, illuminati, insert organization here.

Really!!! So that’s what’s poppin’ on your side of hip-hop. 90% of you believers could not decipher Jay’s old albums. Heck, Jay even knew that and wrote a book to help you all out a little. Watching The Da Vinci code three times and solving two Scooby Doo mysteries does not make you a master of deciphering codes.

The Democratic Party

My biggest slap goes to the Democratic Party. When I say big slap, I mean one of those Street Fighter Hadouken slaps. You had the SUPER MAJORITY and what did you do? Instead of making some moves, you sat back and let the Republican Party act a fool. It seems like you all were too scared to even say the words Healthcare Reform in public. You pretty much did nothing to show your support for the Healthcare Bill. All of a sudden, you want to get a backbone ever since President Barack Obama rolled up walked in the Republican Party dinner and told them what was good in the hood white house.


Seriously, when I saw the discussion on television I jumped up out of my seat and did a series of church stomps and topped it off with a church dip. President Obama walked in that conference room with a “ I wish a ninja would mentality.” At the end of that lecture President Obama could have dropped the mic and walked off stage with Rick Ross’ Boss playing in the background.

That concludes my list. Who would be on your list? Remember this is a judgment free zone, so feel free to have a little fun with it.

-Shana

Monday, August 17, 2009

Weekly Review Aug 17th

Shana

So football preseason started… so what. Preseason is just a grace period (You better f*&# up now and not later). The only people who play full out on the football team during preseason are the liabilities. Liabilities? You may ask. Well a liability is a term that I took from finance and applied it to football. In finance there are two important things you need to know about and those are assets and liabilities. An asset is what puts money in your pocket, i.e. stocks and bonds. A liability is what takes money out of your pocket, i.e car payments and rent. The concept of asset and liabilities can apply to everything including football. Football? You may ask. Yes football. In football your assets are the quarterback and everyone part of the first and second string (sort of stretching it with the second string). These players draw crowds to the football games and we all know large crowds equal big bucks, especially on the overpriced beer and hotdogs. Now everyone one else is a liability. They don’t draw a crowd, except for their dedicated family members and friends. When have you ever heard of fans breaking their neck to see the 3rd, 4th, 5th, string players. The liability players pretty much get paid for “riding the bench,” (Damn it must be nice.) They don’t bring a crowd, so they don’t generate funds, but they still get paid. Well the preseason pretty much consists of all the liabilities running around on the field trying to become an asset: “Put me in coach.”

Vick goes to the Eagles…enough said.

Kourtney and Khole take Miami debuted last night. I am going to wait on the second episode to comment because my classmate says I sound like Khole, e.g., “Why was Kim all up in the episode?”

ABDC aired its second episode of the season and Leiomy killed it. All I can say is ladies step your game up. Leiomy embodied Beyonce. Her hair was flying more than a horse fly. She took me back to Beyonce’s performance of Déjà vu` at the VMA’s. Leiomy was so fierce that I wanted to rush out and get my lace front wig so that I could step out on the dance floor and swing my newly bought hair. Now off to A.B.

A.B. Speaks: And speaking of football, it seems like this season will be focused entirely on Mike Vick.( as I was typing, a breaking news update just came through on Mike Vick.....he sneezed on the field......I will keep you posted on more news as it becomes available).. and that's going to be a shame. Dont get me wrong, I love comeback stories, but I hate that if the Eagles faulter...it will be placed on the shoulders of a backup quarterback. A BACKUP QUARTERBACK! (sorry bout that....kinda moody today) Its amazing how the media portrays professional sport teams to be a team full of divas and everybody has to do singalongs and invite each other over for tea and play connect four....What matters is team chemistry on the field/court and talent. The NFL is so competitive that for the majority of football games, they come down to one or two mistakes. It doesnt matter if Tom Brady didnt invite Randy Moss over to watch saturday morning cartoons, or that Jay Cutler didnt send a party invite to Brian Urlacher while he was online playing Halo 3, but the media will make it front page news.....

After taking a short break A.B speaks again : I dont know about you, but True Blood has me kinda hooked. I would explain the show to you, but then what is wikipedia for? If you havent seen it, take a look at it. It's......different.

Listening to his favorite track, "Booty butt cheeks-The boondocks", A.B returns: Have you ever seen a show, and felt like it was a total waste of time? Like if the producers lived next door, it would turn into wrestlemania? I watched the T.O show last week. Really? Really T.O.? This is the REAL Terrell Owens? yeeeeeeaa. But why am I surprised? This is a VH1 reality show after all.

After taking a look at yahoo: Sign....

Saturday, August 15, 2009

What are we about?

 “(Mike)- " Hi, my name is Mike and I am bored."

(Mike)-"HI MY NAME, IS mike and I AM BORED"

 This is an example of how two sentences can change when you emphasize on different words. Being funny and presenting funny are different. I know what you are thinking....what the Hell are u talking about??! Did you not read the first sentence! I am bored......just playing. The real meaning behind this blog is to let everybody know that we do everything unscripted. If u have not noticed from the first episode, we are not getting paid for this, this is something that we want everybody to enjoy. Hopefully, if we continue to work hard, maybe u might see us on Comedy Central.”

 

This was written by one of our cast members Mike, or AB as we like to call him. It pretty much sums up what we are about. We love to laugh and we love to make other people laugh. There is so much going on in the world today that we would like to be the spot where people can go to temporarily get away from reality. We try to find humor in everything and nine times out ten we are successful. What you can expect from us is laughter, but do not expect quality filming because no one on the cast knows anything about filming, which is clearly evident in episode one.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VjI0_EEa9MM

Not only do we want to discuss and film stories that are funny to us we would also like to film stories that are funny to you. We would love to have fan input in some of the things we do because comedy is funnier when you are involved, so don’t hesitate to contact us with your ideas, the only disclaimer is that we do not partake in comedy that WE consider highly offensive. We can’t please everyone and we will not try. We are just providing viewers a glimpse of how we view life. Well enough about us its time for comedy. Stay tuned.